When you lay your head on the pillow at night for sleep, your brain automatically replays the highlights of your day. They determine the mood you go to sleep in. In my experienced opinion, having no highlight your mind could dwell to during those late night hours has to be worse than having the bad highlights of your bad day. That was me on my bed right now, wishing to fall to some deep sleep. But only my sleeplessness deepened. 

The blankets were making me hot so I pulled them away but seconds later I began to shiver at my room’s coldness. Shit. I didn’t realise how long and loud I must have been tossing and turning until I heard my bedroom door creak open. 

My grandmother asked if I’m alright. She was so sweet a person, lying to her would lead to guilt and further ruin my already ruined night. At the same time being honest about not being alright would cause her to act like I’m sick or death is near or something. She tends to overdo shit sometimes. 

I could hear her soft steps nearing to my bed. “Lee?” She said. “Are you okay?” 

I said nothing. I was buried under my fucking blankets, motionless as the dead. She didn’t ask for the third time. At least she knew how to take a hint. Grandma Mavis. I never heard her steps then as she walked out of my room, but I heard the door close. 

Tell us: what do you do when you can’t sleep?