No one could understand
I tried to explain it
But it did not make sense at all
It was complicated, finding out that what was white is actual Red,
Everything became to change,
Everything around me became a lie in my eyes and mind
But who to blame
deep down my heart had a list
List of people’s names to blame
The first biggest name in that list was the person I trusted the most
Bitterness had me right where I was
My heart bleeded
My mind got lost somewhere,
I lost trust, truth confused me,
It all didn’t make sense at all
no one could get it on my corner,
I looked all around
Please hear me out
It least this is what really happened
But no, people’s ears were already full
Full of lies, gosipp, one sided story
Oh no is it because I’m a stranger
Is it because I’m financial unstable
I asked myself those rhetorical questions
Anger embraced me
Overthinking was never the menu
I ordered but I ate anyway
It was all dark that even the night is better
When the truth becomes lies
When what we’ve seen with our naked eyes is doubted
What more can we say
We’ve said it all
Yet it was all in vain.
inXhosa they say indod’engenamali ayivakali
Pho how did all that affect me?
when did I start speaking in parable
why am I not making any sense?
Yet I’m just a young lady
Young lady longing for peace , love, happiness and truth
It will all make sense one day
My voice will be heard even on my grave
Yes maybe when I’m no more
Yes before second life
When hidden truth get revealed
I did not deserve all that pain
My sin was fighting for the kingdom of God
I thought we all in the same boat
I noticed that we are more like
6 and 9
They seem similar kanti ukumila akufani.
I wish truth become truth
I thought I lost the meaning
Yet people who portrayed it
made it meaningless
Yes I almost said there is no such
until the Truth revealed it self as the only truth
Finally what was red became red
What was white became white
I have forgiven everything
I have forgiven everyone who hurts me even without asking for forgiveness
I have forgiven myself for trusting people more than God
Never again will a walk on that road again.
My heart heal
Bitterness brings nothing but sorrow, grievance and Jealousy.