This sweet love story revolves around a social hot topic, something that is both bemoaned, and held up as something to be proud of: black tax. FunDza writer Amahlathi Aphelile defined it well: ‘Those of us who were lucky enough to get some type of degree and a job, have the unenviable task of “ukwakha ikhaya kuqala – to build our homes first,” before we can take care of ourselves.’ (See her MindSpace blog on the subject of black tax here.)

Apartheid made most black people poor and landless, lacking good education, or jobs. Being successful was difficult. That’s why it is specially defined as a problem of black people, not white people. Most whites over time became relatively well off, jobs were reserved for them, and so they did not have dependants such as unemployed relatives.

But it is also a cultural thing, as FunDza writer Sicelo Kula says in his What’s poppin eKasi blog on black tax: ‘ …it all depends on the culture that exists in your family and community, whether or not you pay this “black tax”.’

Traditionally, black culture is known for strong, extended family ties, and ubuntu. White people, on the other hand, are known for having small nuclear families, and expecting children to be out of the home and working, independent as soon as possible. The elders usually have enough money to remain independent, living in old age homes.

In Zimkhitha Mlanzeli’s story, Siya is from an extremely well-off family, and while her dad may be supporting many other relatives, she certainly doesn’t have to. Malusi, however, has several people to support, including through schooling and varsity. The plot revolves around one aspect: he feels strongly it is his responsibility as a man. Look at this exchange:

“Oh baby, if this is about the money, don’t worry about it. I can pay.” She walked closer to him.
“No!” he barked. “No, I won’t have that,”
“But why? We’re getting married soon and that means what’s mine is yours …”
“I said no, and that’s final.”
“So I have no say in this?”

He refuses to accept help, even though she can well afford it. He does not consult her on where they will go for their honeymoon, and too late, discovers she has much higher expectations than him. This man-in-charge attitude almost leads to them breaking up.

It is Malusi’s wise mother who insists that now he is getting married, he can be expected to do less. His sisters must take responsibility for themselves. His new family is now his main responsibility. And it is Siya’s wise father who makes her see how easily wealth can blind one to the reality of other people’s poorer lives. And the fight helps both young people realise how important communication and sharing is.

It is obviously an honourable thing to help those in need. So why do people complain about black tax? Sometimes the extended family don’t understand how many demands are coming from all sides. Soon the newly employed person starts spending so much, they cannot make their own future secure, for example by buying a home. Some family members may have unreasonable expectations. The ‘tax payer’ becomes stressed and resentful. Poorer relatives may also not realise, for example, how expensive it is to own a car, pay rates, buy a house, send kids to a decent school … and how much actual tax the working relative is paying anyway, to government! (That tax money goes towards social grants, free schooling, healthcare and so on.)

The lesson of the story is that young black professionals – male and female – really have to think about how much ‘black tax’ they can afford, and not be sucked into an unreasonable situation. It’s hard to refuse family members you love, but on the other side the reality is that you can’t make things financially comfortable for everyone!

The story also highlights how important it is for couples to be able to empathise with each other’s family situations, and work out compromises that suit them both.

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Tell us: What are your feelings about ‘black tax’?