“Okay now that we have covered the importance of safe sex, I am going to give you each a pack of condoms. Asiphe, this is a pamphlet that details all the female contraceptives we discussed earlier.”

The counsellor hands me and Phelo condoms, and I take the pamphlet she hands me and stare at it. I am still reeling from all the information she gave us. This was supposed to give me some clarity on this whole sex business, but I am a lot more confused. However, I’m less shy to deal with all of it; talk about it.

“Have either of you ever been tested before?”

I shake my head nervously and Phelo lets out a barely audible, no. I shift uncomfortably as the lady assisting us gets set up.

“That is perfectly fine. I will talk you through everything. I’m giving you what we call a ‘rapid test’, using a pinprick of blood. It’ll only work if you have been infected for three months at least. The results come in 20 minutes. Note that occasionally we have a false-positive, so if it shows positive, you come back for re-testing. If you are worried you may have contracted HIV in the last three months, you’ll need to come back again too, to make sure, despite a negative test.”

She reaches under the table and pulls out HIV pamphlets and hands one to each of us. She steps out and says she wants to give us a moment to read a bit while she gets the test kits. I keep wanting to say ‘Thank you Nurse’ then remember she is an HIV counsellor, which is something I’m having a hard time remembering. The pamphlet has information about how you can contract HIV, and also how to prevent it.

When she comes back, it suddenly all feels too real, like the walls are closing in on me. I know I haven’t had sex but suddenly in this moment it doesn’t matter what I have or haven’t done, all I can seem to focus on is how fast my heart is beating.

I don’t know what I’ll do if Phelo tests positive. I suddenly feel dizzy, like I could fall right out of this chair at any moment. Phelo takes my hand, pulling me back to reality just as the counsellor takes her seat.

“Alright, Asiphe and Phelo, we have covered all the information regarding HIV and we have had a discussion about safe sex. Do you have any questions for me?”

My mouth goes dry instantly so I shake my head. Phelo asks about the needle –apparently needles make him uncomfortable.

“You’ll barely feel a thing Phelo. It’s just a tiny prick. Okay, would you like to have your tests done together, and receive your results in front of each other?”

There is a slight hesitation but we had already decided that we were going to do this together.

“We’d like to do it … I mean get tested together. We already talked about it.”

“Okay, then let’s begin.”

The whole process is quick and easy. Just a little prick on my index finger, a drop of blood on the test thing, and then you wait.

We sit there staring at the tests in front of us, waiting for tiny red lines to appear. Then the lines appear and I hold my breathe.

“As I said earlier, one red line means you are HIV-negative, and two red lines means you are HIV-positive.”

My heart is drumming now. I know it’s impossible for me to be positive but I’m not rational right now. And I know that Phelo has had sex. I can see Phelo holding his breath too, and trying to be brave.

“Both your tests are negative,” says the counsellor with a big smile. “But, Phelo, I would like you to come back in the next three months for a follow-up test.”

On the drive home all I feel is relief and gratitude. Phelo says I didn’t have anything to worry about, cos I’m a virgin and that the only person I should have been worried about was him. I am so happy that we are both negative.

We are parked outside my house in no time. I lean over and give him a kiss, which makes him smile.

“Okay, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah it’s a date.”

“And it’s on you cos I had to drive us to get tested today.”

“Yeah sure. Ice-cream date it is,” I say jumping out the car

As I walk up to my front door I see Itumeleng standing outside my house. She looks like she wants to knock on the door but isn’t sure.

“Itumeleng, hey. What are you doing here?”

“I was hoping we could talk,” she says softly.

“You should have knocked. My Aunty is home. How long have you been standing out here for?”

“Not long, just a few minutes. I would have knocked but I saw that your dad’s car is here and I don’t know if he is cool with me coming here.”

“I told my dad. He won’t judge you.”

Itumeleng sighs with relief.

“Want to come in?”

“No, I should be heading back home. I really just came to give you an update on the situation.”

We take a seat on the front step and she takes a breath.

“It took a while but my dad has come around. It was rough at first. My mom was supportive all the way through. My mother and I talked it over. She knows I still have dreams. I have to finish school and  want to study and …” she looks up at the sky. “I’m not ready for this.” She sighs. “But my mom is supportive. She said she will help me look after the baby while I go back to school.”

We are both quiet for a moment. I don’t need to tell her it won’t be easy. She knows.

“I am here for you if you need anything,” I say.

We hug for a moment.

“I should probably get going. Mom has been cooking up a storm so I can’t miss dinner. I’ll see you at school. Bye.”

“Later.”

As I watch her leave, I am suddenly overwhelmed. It is so scary to think how much Itumeleng’s life has change in such a short time. The choices she made could have easily been mine, which is terrifying. I know just how lucky I am to have been able to avoid being sucked into Lesego’s twisted world. I am also so thankful cos I really dodged a bullet.

If there is one thing I have learnt from this whole situation, it’s that it is important to be responsible and not take anything for granted. I am glad I have chosen to wait, and not rush into having sex.

More than anything I am glad for having found Phelo and for him having found me.

***

Tell us: What about her life and character made Asiphe able to refuse to stay at the party and resist Lesego? How did she ‘dodge the bullet’?