Tuesday, February 11, 2014
To Do List:
- Survive school
- Supper
- Help Sarfoa with home work if she has any (make sure she studies for an hour if she doesn’t)
- Study
Another A4 paper was waiting for me on the front pew same as the day before. There was a new Sudoku puzzle on one side and the same inscription: Solve before close of day for ¢1.
This was another easy one. I took out my pen and this time it took me about three minutes to finish. I didn’t bother looking for him. I knew he’d be at my lunch table.
He was late to lunch, but I had the finished puzzle waiting for him when he arrived. He looked through it whilst he ate two éclairs he had brought from home. After he licked all the icing from his fingers he took out his wallet placed one cedi on the centre of the table and left.
Even my minimum two hours of sleep eluded me that night. Maa Sarfoa woke up in the middle of the night and began screaming for Mom. I got into her bed and tried to calm her down, but she got more aggressive and began shouting even more loudly. Dad came in but that didn’t help either.
“I want Mummy! I want Mummy!” she kept shrieking. “Mummy is . . . Mummy is . . .”
Daddy was struggling to find the right words.
“Mummy is looking for Ntiriwa,” I blurted.
Dad looked at me in surprise. But telling Maa Sarfoa the truth got her to shut up as she digested the new piece of information I had given her.
“But Ntiriwa’s dead,” she said.
I looked to Dad. I wasn’t explaining this part because I myself didn’t understand it properly.
Dad sat on Maa Sarfoa’s bed and carried her on his lap. He rocked her as he spoke.
“Remember we told you Ntiriwa drowned when she went swimming?”
Sarfoa nodded.
“Mummy thinks Ntiriwa is not really dead.”
“So where’s she?”
“Ntiriwa drowned. She’s dead but until Mom sees her dead body she won’t believe she’s dead,” Dad said.
It’s become fish food by now, I thought.
“So is Mummy looking for her body in the sea?” “Sometimes the sea brings back the body to the beach but sometimes it doesn’t. Mummy had a dream. In the dream Ntiriwa was still alive. Mummy thinks . . . Mummy thinks Ntiriwa didn’t die in the water. She thinks someone found her and is looking after her. She thinks Ntiriwa got hurt and can’t remember anything anymore so Mummy is going to the towns along the sea asking if anyone has seen Ntiriwa,” Dad said.
“But will she find her?”
“I don’t think so, sweetie. Ntiriwa didn’t know how to swim properly. She shouldn’t have gone swimming in the sea. But Mummy is very sad right now. She won’t be happy if she doesn’t do what she’s doing.”
“But I miss her.”
“I miss her too, sweetie.”
“I want her to come home.”
“Me too, sweetie.”
Maa Sarfoa was quiet for a long time. Half of the time I forgot she was only seven. How was she dealing with this? How was she coping? How were any of us coping for that matter?
“Is Ntiriwa in heaven?”
“Yes,” Dad said with a quiet conviction that made Sarfoa relax.
“Will we see her again?”
“Of course.” He kissed her head. “When we die and go to heaven. We’ll see her again.”
“And Jesus?”
“And Jesus. Would you like to pray for Mummy?” “Uh huh.”
They both closed their eyes and Sarfoa prayed, “Father God, thank you for my Mummy and Daddy and Gyikua. Please make Mummy happy and bring her home. And please keep her safe. In Jesus name. Amen.”
“Amen,” Dad and I chorused.
Dad kept rocking Sarfoa until she fell asleep. He tucked her in, came to my bed and knelt by my bedside. His eyes were full of tears. I wished I could take him in my arms and rock him to sleep the same way he had rocked Sarfoa.
“If I knew where to look, I’d go and bring her back but I don’t. Her phone’s out of coverage area whenever I call. She called me yesterday but the reception was terrible and I couldn’t hear a word she said. I keep leaving her messages to call you guys. I can understand she’s upset with me for not thinking Ntiriwa is alive but she shouldn’t do this to you guys. I’m so sorry you have to go through this.”
I wanted to say something to comfort him because I knew he was hurting too. He kissed my forehead and I felt his tears on my forehead. He got up, switched off the light and left.