The needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Sometimes we do things we don’t want to do because we are left with no other choice. I probably don’t make sense. But what I mean is, sometimes we make other people sad because if we don’t, our own happiness will be sacrificed.
Some people call it selfishness. But for how long can we put other people’s interest before ours?
When I told mom that I’ll be moving in with Tee, she was taken aback. I could see she was unsettled by the news. I tried to explain that it was only for the exam period, just until dad leaves.
Oh shoot, I didn’t tell you.
Dad is around. And I won’t say anymore because he doesn’t deserve any thought or mention on my private space.
That’s why I must go. I need a happy, friendly space, where I can breathe and concentrate for my exams.
“Zinzi you don’t have to leave because of him. You really don’t have to run away from him,”
But what mom doesn’t understand is that I can’t stay. As sad and as hurtful as this is to her, it’s for our own good. Things are deteriorating, and I’ve tried my level best to turn a blind eye, but I just can’t live like this.
I had to give up my room for him. Isn’t that a clear sign that we cannot all fit in this house? It’s suddenly became claustrophobic. Bumping into someone you don’t want to speak to in the corridors is not a healthy way of living. And this is not our old mansion where I could easily avoid him for weeks, if I wanted to. This house is just not big enough.
There are too many egos in here. It’s too small for all this tension and hostility.
He’s been trying to speak to me and ‘explain himself’. But I have no time to listen to his lies. I’ve had enough of those to last me a lifetime. One look at him just brings fury and rage to my heart. I could strangle him to death!
You can’t tell me you’ve never had a death wish for some in your entire life. Some people deserve to die – yes, I said it – my father falls in this list too! He’s of better use to me dead than alive.
But I wouldn’t tell this to my mother. I hate to say it but she clearly still loves him. Otherwise how do you explain how she is always sticking out for him?
Well, I don’t blame her coz ever since he landed, Sim has been behaving. He is home most of the time, and, they play together, most of the time. The poor boy thinks he is here to stay. I feel sorry for Sim. He will be heartbroken the day the truth comes to light – and he discovers a big lie.
I understand her need to keep me, but even the most protective lioness understands that its offspring will one day grow old enough to want to stand on its own.
If she has done a really good job in grooming and preparing me for the world, then she has to believe that nothing will go wrong?
ZZ xxx
Dish it: How old are you gonna be when you move out of home? Or how old were you when you did?