Fuck, I hate secrets!!!

I just wish my parents understood this, especially my mom. I mean, am I not old enough now to understand the sacred things of the adult world? Why then do they still keep things behind my back? Why?

I am not child anymore. I really don’t understand why my parents would think it is best for them to lie to me. I hate lies! I hate being lied to…but my parents don’t seem to understand this. Imagine finding out that your dad is sick and in hospital through a slip of a tongue!? That’s how I found out that dad has lung cancer and has been hospitalised for the past two days.

How did I find out? Through Sim! Even the dweeb knew. Imagine! We were talking on the phone and he mentioned something about dad’s “tests” that haven’t came yet from the lab.

This is what I hate about my parents! They always think they can protect us by keeping the truth from us. One would think they’d have learnt from the years that the truth has a funny way of coming out, that eventually the truth will come out. Of course, what we don’t know will never hurt us, but what happens when we finally get to know of it? What then?

What then when the truth comes out? What will happen? I don’t think my parent ever think this far. And now they are cooking up a story about how there was never a right time to tell me. I was writing and they – being the thoughtful parents they are – didn’t want me to stress about it. Eventually they’d have told me, mom says. Why did I have to find out like this though?

“This is exactly why we didn’t tell you…we knew this is how you’d react! We knew you wouldn’t handle it well…” my mom said. Oh…Ok! How am I supposed to react? Normal? No. Nothing is normal here. Dad’s been sick and no one felt the need to tell me. She’s known for more than three months, but still didn’t tell me.

Now, I’m the one who’s in the wrong. I’m the one who’s reacting as if I’m the only one who’s been affected. Dad’s “going for ‘routine check up’”. I shouldn’t bother myself and I should go to Jozi and have a hell of a nice time… that’s what mom seems to be saying. But I don’t think I’m going anymore. I was supposed to be leaving tomorrow evening. I hope Tee will understand.

Shit, this is just a mess…thanks to my parents who don’t know that secrets will always come out, and when they do, there will be unnecessary casualties and victims.

ZZ xxx

Dish it: what secrets have your parents kept behind your back? How did you feel when you found out?