So what exactly does NO mean?

Well, imagine, for a moment, a guy who continues doing something even when a girl says NO to him. As a guy, would you ever want to be that guy? And, as a girl, would you ever want such a guy near you?

So let’s talk about this guy who doesn’t take NO for an answer. Who is he and where in South Africa can we find him? And what does he do when a girl says NO to him? The answers to these two questions should probably be worrying each and every South African, whether young or old.

The guy who refuses to take NO for an answer is probably found across all corners of South Africa. In other words, this guy can be a guy that lives in a shack, an RDP house, or even in the suburbs. This guy simply believes that he doesn’t have to listen when a woman says NO. He doesn’t believe in her right to give permission to anything that happens to her body.

Instead, he laughs when she says NO. He pushes her against a wall and tells her she’s got no power. He presses her down and forces himself on her. This is South Africa’s reality. This is what some men, whether young or old, do in our country.

I even heard of a story where this one family had a friend who tried to rape their fourteen-year-old daughter. He was at her parent’s house when he sent her to go fetch something at his house. Shortly after she left he followed after her. When he got to his house he locked the door and tried to rape her despite her repeated protests.

Luckily, his brother intervened and the girl was saved. But unfortunately, though, not every girl is that lucky. Some women and girls never get saved.

So what can we, as the guys, do to curb the trend? What can we do to make some sort of difference?
Well, one thing I can tell you is that it’s not completely hopeless.

We can start with the small things. We can start by accepting that, as guys, each time we speak to women and ask them for things, NO is a possibility. In other words, when you ask for a girl’s number, ask her out on a date, or ask her to have sex with you, she might just say NO.

Why is NO a possibility, you ask?

The answer is simple, actually. Just like every other person who walks this earth, she has a right to reject what she doesn’t like.

They say that guys who don’t care about violence against girls usually start to care when that violence is committed against their sisters or girlfriends. So imagine if each time your sister or girlfriend walks the street, guys ask for her number, ask to accompany her, to take her out, or to have sex with them. Imagine, then, that your sister or girlfriend says NO, but guys choose to not listen. What do you think will happen, then? You see that’s exactly the problem that faces South Africa.

So talk to me, ladies and gentleman. Tell me what you think.

#ChatBack: Do you agree that in South Africa we have a problem of guys not taking NO for an answer from girls?

And if you agree, do you think there’s anything we can do to try and change the situation?

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