You may have heard of ‘soft life’ on social media before. On TikTok and Instagram, videos show women living in luxury, taking international trips, doing expensive beauty treatments and wearing designer clothes. But where did the term ‘soft life’ initially come from? And do you think a ‘soft life’ is something that you want to have?

The phrase ‘soft life’ became popular in 2020 and originated from the Nigerian influencer community to describe living a life of ease. The term soft life is primarily used on social media, including the hashtag #softlife. It is especially popular among younger Black social media users, especially Black women.

On TikTok and Instagram, videos show women (and men) living in luxury, taking international trips, doing expensive beauty treatments and wearing designer clothes. But where did the term ‘soft life’ originally come from? And do you think a ‘soft life’ is something that you want to have? To some people, a soft life means living a life of comfort, ease and luxury. It means having everything you want, when you want it, without working hard for it. It also includes surrounding yourself with beauty, indulging in the finer things in life, and enjoying the privileges that come with wealth and success.

Author Lebogang Masango wrote a book called ‘The Soft Life: Love, Choice and Modern Dating’, where she interviewed young black women living in South Africa. She asked them what living a soft life meant for them. And the general consensus from the women interviewed seemed to agree that soft life is lived by choosing a life that is selective with resistance, allows you to make mistakes gracefully, and chooses self-care with no remorse, even if others demand your time and energy from you.

Singer Nomfundo Moh released a song called ‘Soft Life’, where she sings about wanting better opportunities and that young people in South Africa deserve the chance to live a soft life where we all share knowledge and uplift each other. Living a soft life does not mean that you have to be wealthy or privileged. Trying to copy what we see on social media can create unrealistic expectations and pressure us to maintain a certain image or standard of living.

It’s important to remember that true happiness and fulfilment come from within and that material possessions and external validation are fleeting and ultimately unsatisfying. It’s about having a positive mindset and attitude towards life. It’s about living with grace, kindness, and compassion towards yourself and others while prioritising your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. It means that you take care of yourself and practice self-love.

Living a “soft life” also means being grateful for what you have and finding joy in the simple things. It means you appreciate the present moment and don’t take things for granted. Finally, living a soft life means pursuing your dreams and aspirations with passion and determination.

When we are told how we must live our lives, we frequently resent those around us living lives of ease or softness. But by living a soft life, we can lead fulfilling and meaningful lives that are full of joy, happiness, ease, and purpose. Embodying these traits can lead us to live in a self-empowering and nurturing way – we are allowed to be soft and strong at the same time.

Tell us: what does living a ‘soft life’ mean to you?

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