Five years later, after graduations and job seeking, I knew that I couldn’t handle the fact that I was not with Palesa. I thought if she doesn’t love me as a man then she might love me as a woman. It was time for a sexual transition. I had to make changes on my body. I went to see specialists. I got different opinions. I kept it a secret from my mom, even Palesa too because for her I wanted it to be surprise.

Doctors prescribed me hormone pills to help me before surgery. The medication was to help me to develop womanly features. Slowly they started to develop. I knew that my chance to be with Palesa was around the corner. I kept in touch with Palesa, and she was complementing my voice. Maybe she was suspecting something. Surgery went successful; it was made official that I was no longer a man but a woman. I took my time to be alone, to adjust to being woman. It is nice to be a woman. I spent time in the mirror complimenting myself.

My mom was angry when she found out, and she disowned me. Palesa was charmed, she didn’t know that I was the girl she was long waiting to fall in love with. I moved from being a boy to be a girl, from being a girl to being a lesbian. Palesa was on a transsexual program. She wanted to be a full man. She fell in love with me without knowing that I’m the guy she used to know. All I needed was love and to be in a relationship with her. Her transformation was going well and her parents were supporting her.

She was a man and I was a woman. We had to change our identity, names and genders. It was when I came clean to her. I told her who I was, only to find out that she was already deep in love. It took her by surprise. I can’t say “her” anymore she is transformed. I guess that’s what she thinks about me to. She decided that she will adopt Kgashane and I decided that I will adopt Palesa as my name. We swapped names and genders. Love was our daily meal. It took me a long time to adjust to our new living conditions.

Out of nowhere our parents met and showed off their differences. It was both clear; we were fathered by same man. And the aim was to break us apart. And the question is how they can do it? It was clear that someone cheated with a prostitute. For Kgashane to be Palesa and Palesa to be Kgashane was the first mistake that the love birds had committed. Gender transsexual was our worst blunder.

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