See, Bokang – affectionately called BK by all his friends – has been haunting my very soul since about six months ago. The love I feel for him is different to the love I have for Katlego. My love for him is the one that has taken me by surprise. It’s the kind of love I never saw coming. The kind that has kept me up at night since, refusing to let me rest.
BK and I got trapped in the elevator one day six months ago. Yes, we had known each other for a quite a long time before then and I would say that even though he was best friends with Kat, I considered him my friend too. He was always the clown in the group, the one with all the jokes and a thousand friends. Everywhere we went, there was always a bunch of people who knew BK.
He and I and I spent the two hours in the elevator changed my view of him completely. We connected on a deeper level, a soul level. He and I felt each other in a way that we had never felt one another before. Mentally, emotionally and psychologically. I felt in tune with him. I felt like I had found my equal. That day, he reached for my hand, but touched my heart instead.
Though I love Katlego, I never felt we connected the way BK and I connected that day in the elevator.
Right before the maintenance people rescued us, BK and I looked into each other’s eyes and I could read the words etched in his heart. I could feel that even though we both knew we couldn’t stay in that confined space forever, we didn’t want to leave. I felt like our souls had met before, a long time ago and had made an agreement to find one another once again in this lifetime.
“I knew from the first day I saw you, that you were the one my soul had been searching for,” Bokang said, right before we stepped out of the elevator.
Since that day, I don’t think I’ve peacefully slept through the night. His soul tortures mine in a way that I can’t even express. I see his eyes every time I close mine trying to find sleep. I can hear his heartbeat every time I try to quiet mine especially around Katlego.
I can’t and have not told this to Katlego because I know that first of all, he won’t even understand what I’m talking about. He’s intellectual – not spiritual. I’m about to open my mouth to say something to him when I hear movement from outside my window.
My heart thuds in my chest as I look out the window and see Bokang come up in the direction of my room. I turn around to hear the sound of a gun being cocked right in front of my face. I didn’t even realise Katlego had a gun with him.
“What are you planning to do with that?” I ask, my voice trembling from sheer panic.
“You’ll find out when your boyfriend gets here.”
“He’s not boyfriend, Kat. We haven’t done anything, I swear to you.”
There’s a knock on the door. Kat shouts for BK to come in.
“Sit down!” he shouts as soon as BK enters.
Bokang’s hands shoot up into the air as soon as he sees what’s going on.
“Bro, what’s going on here? What are you doing?”
“Shut up!” yells Katlego, “I’m asking the questions!”
“Enhle, are you hurt? Are you okay?” BK asks, his body moving close to mine.
I want to respond but I’ve turned into a statue as tears pour down my face.
“She’s fine. Don’t speak to her. Don’t even look at her,” Katlego shouts, also trying to move closer to me. “Does Zamo know about you two?”
My heart skips a beat.
“We can talk about this, bro. Put the gun away and let’s talk,” Bokang pleads. “Let Zinhle go and you and I can talk things through like men,” he continues.
Katlego chuckles. “Now you want to talk.” He says, “If my real friends at campus hadn’t told me about you two, when where you going to talk to me?”
My best friend, Nomzamo, barges into the room at this moment not realising what’s going on inside. BK reckons it’s the perfect opportunity to try and wrestle Katlego for the gun while we’re distracted by Nomzamo. They go at it as Nomzamo and I watch in terror.
“Guys, stop it!” I shout, but, they don’t.
The gun goes off and the wrestling on the floor comes to a halt. All I can see is blood.
I gasp for air. She screams.
Tell us: Whose blood do you think that was?