Nothing was wrong. We had gone to sleep at 10 p.m. after watching the news together on the couch. He had given me a kiss and said goodnight before I turned on my side and fell asleep. I felt his body next to me and his warmth made me feel safe and assured. He loved me and nothing made me happier than knowing this.

I pulled the covers over my head and felt the heavy blanket on top slide down. He groaned as he always did when I left him exposed to the cold. He always said I hogged the blanket, which was ridiculous. I would roll my eyes and pull it over him.

He would mumble something about how he loved me but I drove him crazy and fall into a deep sleep with soft snoring. Whenever I elbowed him to stop, he would pull me closer and bury his face in my neck, his breath making the hair on my neck rise. I didn’t enjoy cuddles before I met Andile Kheswa.

The night had passed by so fast and before I knew it, he had drew the curtains and the light came screaming in. I still wanted to keep my eyes closed longer but I knew that I had to wake up. I dragged myself out of bed and noticed the suitcase by the door. This was strange. Andile was standing by the window, in his suit. He hadn’t told me about any trip so what was this?

“Babe, are you going somewhere?”

“Zola, I am leaving,” he said, turning around to face me. I looked at him but he didn’t want our eyes to meet.

“Do you have business out of town? Did I forget something?” I asked, pulling over my gown and tying it, the chenille fabric softly caressing my skin. I pulled it closer. This was a chilly Monday morning and I had no idea it was about to get colder.

“No, Zola. I am leaving. I am leaving you. I want a divorce,” he said, now looking at me.

I tried to read the expression on his face but there was nothing there. I knew there was a tub chair behind me so I tried to feel my way into it. I think for some reason everything just went blank and I felt him grabbing me before I could fall.

“Baby. Zola, are you OK?” I heard him say as I balanced myself on the chair.

“I think so, except that my husband of five years is walking out on me. Yes. Yes I am fine.” I said, trying to process this is my head. I tried to breathe in.

“Zola, I am sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. We tried to end this but it’s…”

“We? We? So there is…” I said and then stopped myself.

“Yes, there is someone else. I want you to know that we tried not to end this amicably, without this drama and I am hoping that…”

“Wow Andile. Are you serious right now? You are going to leave me? After everything that we have been through together? Baby, please don’t do this. Andile, we can sort this out. ”

“No, Zola. I am leaving. Please don’t cry. My lawyer will contact you,” he said grabbing the car keys and grabbing his cell phone.

He wheeled the suitcase out. I stood there trying to recollect my mind. What had just happened. I rushed after him.

“Please, please don’t leave me. Andile please don’t leave me,” I said now crying, running towards him. I just wanted to be in his arms again. I wanted to feel his arms around me. I grabbed his jacket and moved closer.

“Baby, think about this. Andile! Please baby. ” I said but he pulled my hands off and pushed me. I fell against the kitchen counter. He didn’t look back, he opened the door and walked out.

I felt a sharp pain on my side and tried to stand up. The pain hurt but not as the pain in my heart. It was as if the walls in our flat could see me and were laughing at me. My first instinct was to run after him so I could get him to come back. But I didn’t.

I sat there on the cold tiled floor, not wanting to move, until there was a knock at the door. I thought he had changed his mind and came home. He couldn’t have driven far. I rushed to the door, brushing my hair back and wiping my tears as I walked. I opened the door, anticipating my love’s face, but it was a delivery man with a bunch of flowers.

I read the card.

“I’ve always been thankful for all that you have done for me and for believing in me. I am sorry that things didn’t work out. I just fell out of love with you and there is nothing I can do about that. It would be unfair to both of us if I stayed. I wish you all the best for the future. ”

***

Tell us: What would you do if you were in Zola’s shoes and your husband was filling for divorce?