The pain that I go through, I don’t think you can comprehend.
I never get to sleep, because I cry all night.
You have conjured a way of seeing me through the darkness.
I close my eyes and find myself halfway between pleasure and confusion.
With all my nerves twisting and turning and rising up out of my body
Like a dangerous hurricane.

I thought, I could fix you; save you!
Thought that if I stayed, you would finally love me in the right way,
Instead you kept me isolated from my friends and family.
I apologise for my body.
I apologise for my decisions.
I apologise for the prevalent genital injuries resulting from all the sexual assaults.

Maybe one day I’ll stop apologising and begin healing again.