One day I will not need love any more.
I will not rise to open the door
‘Cause that sound I am hearing is all in my head.
You loved him the way fragile kids love candy.
You wrote songs and letters about him.
You still sleep with his shirt to smell the cologne on it.
Anxiety will not let me breathe.
Because I was a fool in love.

When I caught you cheating
You made my heart bleed.
I attended a nearby funeral procession.
I joined mourners there to cry my heart out.
Then I realised I never loved you.
I felt pity for you and couldn’t let you go.
You were suicidal and lost everyone close to you.
I did not want to see you in that dark place.
So I stayed to keep watch on you.

It became a devil snare for me.
I got trapped in a situation where you always came first.
I tolerated your toxic behaviour.
I had to support your childish trait.
Found myself accepting your drunkenness.

I really wanted it to be you.
I so badly wanted it to be you that
I will walk with to the altar.
Until I understood I was never in your plans.
I was your cry shoulder in your darkest moments.
You had someone to entertain you daily.
Until you got bored and came running to me with your problems.

I was never a boyfriend in your eyes.
You loved me because I reminded you of your father.
So instantly I was a father figure you wanted to uplift you.

I loved you when no else did.
I sacrificed my sanity to see you smile.
I can’t put into words what that did to my heart.
I was hurt so deeply that I thought I would never love again.

Now that the dust has passed and settled
I’ve found somebody to help me find myself.
Who appreciates and values my love for her.
I bought a dress and a wedding ring for you.
This person will wear them on your behalf.

I saw that’s there’s nothing painful like regret.
Wondering what could have been.
In this love month you are sending me
Messages for forgiveness.
I am preparing a wedding for myself.
I can’t worry about spilt milk
While I have platinum in front of my eyes.

Finally I realised that I was never asking for too much.
I was with the wrong person to give me affection.
You were with me because I was your therapist.
I am with someone that loves and support me wholeheartedly.
You gave me a lesson in life.
Don’t stay in a relationship because
You are afraid of what will happen to another person.
Stay in a relationship because you are loved and appreciated.
Knowing someone out there is praying for you.
I am living testament to it.
I have found that one who is is dearest to my heart and soul.