My hand shakes while holding the pen
thinking how I’ll start this.
How will I explain/express
my feelings on a piece of paper?
My mind is occupied,
my heart hurts.
I wanna scream my lungs out
& cry my heart out.
I cry my pillow wet
My tears would fill an entire ocean.
I want to talk to someone
who’ll understand everything
I’m feeling without any judgement.
But who?
Everyone is to busy.
Even the one who is my shoulder to cry on
is to busy to make time for me.
I’m asked, “why are you so quiet?”
Unfortunately I never have
an answer to that question.
I never know how I’ll explain
to you why I’ve been so quiet.
Instead I just say, “it’s nothing.”
I take deep breaths hoping the pain will fade away
– I pray for a solution,
to be able to accept everything as it is,
not force things and to find peace of mind.