I tried to be independent
But I found “male” in “female”
I found “man” in “woman”
I am the queen of her own cattle
But I am seen as dangling tassels
And no matter the struggle,
I will always hustle.

You might be called head of the house,
But I say I am the neck
I give you direction
Without my effort you can never move
You might want to face the skies with pride,
But I have the power
To make you face the ground with shame.

So now listen,
Can I be free from your hot slaps
For I am not your drum.
Can I be free from your stony fists
For I am not your punching bag.
Can I be free from your rough kicks
For I am not your football.

When I cry,
You see my tears as a beautiful waterfall
When I scream,
You hear my voice as a melodious song
When I bleed,
You see my blood as a festive wine.

What’s wrong with respecting,
What’s hard about caring,
What’s impossible about loving,
What’s challenging about being a good man.
Because I know you can be?


We are very concerned for the safety of all our readers and writers. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to people if you are being abused.

LifeLine has a free number you can call to speak to someone who understands: try 0861 322 322 or 021 461 1111. There is also the domestic violence hotline: 0800 150 150.