(Muzi wakes up and remembers what he told his parents the previous day)

Muzi: (to himself) Oh boy, I’m screwed! Let me speak to Sihle.

(The phone rings and Sihle picks up on the other side)

Sihle: Do you have any idea what time it is?

Muzi: I know, I am sorry. I need to speak to you.

Sihle: About what now? I already told you that I am not going to board your crazy train.

Muzi: Just for once think about me, just this once!

Sihle: I am going back to sleep, b…

Muzi: I’ve already told my parents that you’re coming for dinner tomorrow. Don’t turn me down.

Sihle: No man, I can’t. Your parents will tell my parents and it will be a huge mess.

Muzi: I am running out of time, man. Come on!

Sihle: No means ‘no’. It doesn’t mean ‘convince me’.

Muzi: I am not asking you to kill a person. I want your acting skills in action. Work with me here. I’ll owe you, big time. I can take you on a holiday to Madagascar or anywhere you like.

Sihle: That’s playing with my imagination!

Muzi: I am that serious. I am screaming desperation!

Sihle: I can’t be what you’re asking me. If it was anything else, I would have been on board.

Muzi: So, do you want to spend your whole summer here in Mzansi rather than Madagascar? Think about that, topless beautiful girls at your disposal. We’ll party from dawn to twilight. You want to lose out on that?

Sihle: I am listening.

Muzi: I’ll book a room at Anjajavy L’Hotel. It is a paradise, Heaven on earth! I’m talking about a real blue ocean view every time you wake up, ultimate romantic beach, fantastic beverages and girls!

Sihle: I hate you, I hate you! How do I say no to that? (squirming)

Muzi: You can’t! It’s your dream holiday. Now make me happy.

Sihle: Okay, but I’ll regret this. I’ll be your…whatever that is.

Muzi: Thanks man! I’ll…

(Someone is approaching Muzi’s room)

Muzi: I’ll meet you later at Glen cafe, to go through some stuff.

Sihle: Sure. Now can I…

Muzi: Go back to sleep? Yes.

(Muzi hangs up. There is a knock on his bedroom door)

Muzi: Yes!

Zodwa: Are you awake?

Muzi: Yes, mother. I’ll be down in a minute.

Zodwa: I want to talk to you.

Muzi: Now?

Zodwa: Yes, your father has gone to work.

Muzi: I am naked mother and too tired to wake up, especially for talking.

Zodwa: You were talking to the phone just now. I heard you!

Muzi: What? (gasping)

Zodwa: Don’t worry. I only heard the last sentence.

Muzi: What do you want to talk about mother?

Zodwa: About what you told us yesterday. Was it true?

Muzi: Yes, mother. Please, understand that I’m different. I’m not that ideal son you thought I was.

Zodwa: I am hurt. You don’t understand my pain. This is too painful to bear.

Muzi: I know mother, I know.

Zodwa: Come down for breakfast when you’re ready.

Muzi: I will. Thank you.

(Muzi gets in the shower and then gets changed. He goes downstairs to the kitchen)

Muzi: I am here mother.

Zodwa: Sit down and eat.

Muzi: So much food for three people. What a waste!

Zodwa: I invited your cousins to have breakfast with us. They should be here by now.

Muzi: I should get going then. See you later.

Zodwa: Sit! You’re not going anywhere. What’s wrong with having breakfast with them?

Muzi: Mother, I know why you invited them. I don’t have a disease. It’s who I am! Accept me or kick me out of your house.

Zodwa: I am not tryi…

Muzi: Cut that out mother! So, what’s it going to be? Acceptance of me or should I start packing up?

Zodwa: Is it wrong that I’m trying to help you, son? I am your mother! I have to try at least. I can’t let you die in front of me! What kind of a mother would I be?

Muzi: That doesn’t answer my question.

Zodwa: You’re so stubborn, just like your father.

Muzi: Don’t try mother. I warn you. I am running out of patience. Do you accept me or not?

Zodwa: I can’t just accept without trying. We have to go and consult. Maybe someone might help you.

Muzi: You’re wasting my time! Where is dad? I know he’ll answer me.

Zodwa: He’s gone to work. He’ll be back later this evening.

(There is a knock on the door)

Zodwa: It should be them! Please behave and don’t say anything about…you know.

(Zodwa opens the door and meets two smiling faces)

Zodwa: You made it!

Thabiso: We wouldn’t miss your breakfast for the world, Aunt!

Zola: Nice to see you Aunt! Oh, that smell is pulling me in!

Zodwa: You’re exaggerating! Come on in.

(They walk into the kitchen)

Thabiso: Muzi! You’re all grown up! I haven’t seen you in, like, three years!

Muzi: You’re always abroad. It’s your fault.

Zola: True. I always tell him to spend summer locally.

Thabiso: And give up on visiting the world’s most beautiful destinations? No ways! YOLO!

Zola: Family is all.

Muzi: It depends.

Zodwa: Come on boys, have seats and eat.

Thabiso: So, I’ve heard the big news for you, Muzi!

Zola: You’re getting married, doctor!

Thabiso: Aren’t you excited?

Muzi: Oh, yeah, I am. There’s a lot to do before the wedding day.

Zola: But you’re way too young to be getting married!

Muzi: Tell that to my parents.

Thabiso: Nonsense! Marriage is sacred. It’s a benediction. You’re lucky.

Zola: In the contemporary world, marriage is a trap. No booze and guys’ nights! All you do is work for your family, and eat until you have huge tummy.

Thabiso: Shut up! You have no idea what you’re talking about.

Zola: Hey! I know exactly what I am talking about. I’ve seen it. Marriages nowadays don’t last anyway. Divorce statistics are astonishing! I hope you’ve thought this through carefully, Muzi.

Muzi: I have. It’s all I want. I have my parents’ full support. Don’t worry.

Thabiso: That’s a good indication.

Muzi: Of what?

Thabiso: Your marriage will last.

Muzi: What if it doesn’t happen?

(They all laugh, except Zodwa)

Zola: This tastes great! Can I have another pancake Aunt?

Zodwa: Sure, there!

Muzi: I should get going. It was nice seeing you two fellas.

Zola: Same here! You’re not going to sleep with a girl, are you?

Muzi: No! I am off.

Thabiso: See you some other time kid!

(Muzi goes out)

Thabiso: He doesn’t look sad, Aunt.

Zodwa: It’s all a pretence.

Zola: I can’t believe you’re doing this to him. He’s been whatever you wished.

Zodwa: It’s for his own good. He’ll be too focused on his work to have time for girls. It’s better if he finds a wife now.

Thabiso: He still doesn’t deserve it.

Zodwa: I know. We had no choice.

Zola: Where is uncle?

Zodwa: He’s at work. Now finish up your food. You two will help me in the house with DIY!

Zola: We have to…

Thabiso: We would love to!

(Zola gives Thabiso a crocodile eye)

***

Tell us: Do you agree that marriage these days is a trap?