It was roses and sunshine; we were not lovers yet, but we were very sure that we are about to start something unstoppable. We exchanged texts, FaceTime and voice calls with each other like the world was doomed to end. You were the first person I’d run to whenever I had a bad day, you were my human diary, which I kept dear to my heart, yet it has run out of pages to listen to my rants and outbursts.

I always knew after a long day there was someone whom I could vent to, share my laughter and sweet moments with, I knew there was a place I could run to in times of despair. I knew there was somewhere I was tolerated and someone I could confide in; cry and offload all the burdens that suppressed my spirit.

Once upon a time someone loved me unconditionally and even vowed to do whatever it took to end up being with me once in this lifetime. Someone shared his dreams, regrets and accolades ceaselessly with me without fear or holding anything back. Once in this lifetime someone opened up about his childhood trauma to me, I remember you told me how your father once used the back of a gun to hit you, how you silently envied your big brother because he was your parents’ favourite. I recalled you told me how your mother once scolded you when you were playing in a mango tree with your friends and how you got the scar on your forehead.

You are a home I couldn’t turn to, yet I keep missing anyway. You are my once-upon-a-time, the best I never had and the faded colours of the rainbow shortly after the rain. You will always hold that special place in my heart and I will love you for eternity.


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