My mind was always filled with many things, good and bad, but mostly “worse”. Thinking straight was not my strong point. It always felt like I had a burden on my shoulders, it felt like I was carrying the whole world full of sorrow, sadness and anger.
Becoming a teenager is one thing that everyone should be happy about because it is a time in which you get to be wise and learn more about your true being. For me, happiness only came when it was night, when the lights were already turned off and sleep was on my eyes.
I was broken in the inside, with my heart torn to pieces that not just anyone could fix. I never wanted to share even a piece of my worries with my parents or a teacher for that matter. To me, everything that was happening was personal, way too personal that I never wanted to share the pain with anyone.
One time at school our English teacher was teaching us about a diary, how important it is and how one can make it a best friend, especially a teenager. I did not take the lesson seriously, just like I did not take others seriously. One thing so strange and shocking happened to me.
At night, immediately after turning off the lights in my room, I began to think about a diary. I began to think about all the advantages of a diary that our teacher had taught us about. Well, a diary is just a book without a mouth or ears to listen to what a person is saying. But it is so trustworthy in such a way that it even carriers your personal things and all the burden without complaining. I smiled inside the darkness of my blankets and said to myself, “Finally, I’ll get to have my personal confidante that will never say a thing to anybody but will only be seen as a book with hundreds of papers.”
I made sure that the next day I got myself a diary.
I wrote all my worries and ways to solve those worries. After that it felt like I’d been talking to someone I can trust. I just got relieved and felt like I’m in a new world where there are no worries and pains. I also wrote positive and motivating words that I always read aloud to myself every morning in order to start a day on a positive lane.
I have to admit, my diary brought me a lot of change. It helped boost my confidence and now I have started to dream big again because I know there are no longer any worries holding me back, simply because I put them all in my diary to keep them for me. My diary has brought me a lot of peace in the heart and in my mind too.