The day I found out I was pregnant and jobless I cried myself to sleep. I asked myself, “How will I raise a child without an income? What life will it be for my child? What if I’m not ready to be a good mom? What if I won’t have anyone to support me? How will I tell my mom about this?” I had hopes for the future but now they seemed shattered.

Months went by and my mother noticed that I was pregnant, she was disappointed but she was supportive too. Everyone in my family was supportive. I had my best friend, Yibinathi Booi, and the baby daddy and his family too. They made my pregnancy easy.

20th September 10:07 am my prince was born. I cried when I saw him for the first time. My first sight of him was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

I was too scared to touch him for the first time. I was worried and happy at the same time. I held him for a moment; but I will hold his heart for a lifetime.

At four months I heard his laugh for the first time and it made my heart glitter, it was the most beautiful sound in the world.

Seeing him cry, makes me cry too. When I feed him, I get full too, because his happiness fills me. He pulls my braids with his sharp nails while we are playing, it hurts but it makes me happy at the same time.

Being a mom is hard; waking up every night between 1 and 6 a.m. to the sound of him laughing at me as if he is punishing me. But I do everything with love and care.

I love you, Luphawo Luthando Athanam.

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