I’m sitting here thinking, at this time and in this age there are still women out there that are highly dependent on their life partners. Women who call themselves ‘Certified Housewives’ and really believe in the ‘Indoda must’ stigma. HAIBO! It can never be me!

No offence but I am truly not in support of this. What happens if your man gets fed up one day and decides to get up and leave? What will become of you? Should you have children, what will become of them? Not every man leaves and still takes care of his seeds. Some leave you with your children to figure life out by yourself.

OK, let’s say he doesn’t leave but he becomes toxic, what happens then? Will you stay and swallow everything as bitter as it is just because you have no plan B for your life? Why must your life be tied to another human being for the wrong reasons? The minute you depend on someone, you start worshipping them.

God says in Exodus 20, “Know no other Gods but me,” and yet here we are. Why am I quoting the Bible? It is because I’ve heard other women defending themselves with a quote from the Bible. “Even the bible says a man must provide,” they would say. Is there anywhere in the bible that is written, “A woman must never provide”? Because if there is then I definitely don’t know my Bible that well.

My point about this whole topic is: wake up, black woman, and smell the coffee! The minute you are dependent you have high chances of being treated worse than you deserve. You become belittled, less respected, a doormat, you name it. Don’t you think you deserve better than that? We can’t always be brought to the table and it ends there. There’s nothing as attractive as an independent woman. Don’t be left behind, take charge of your life, build your own future, have your own source of income, be a role model to your children, be fruitful, be productive, and be a woman supreme. There’s no glow that can ever surpass the one that comes with independence. I’m sure you also want a piece of that, don’t you?

Tell us: What are your thoughts about this essay?