It’s true when they say the people that hurt you the most are your loved ones. I was 15 years old when my heart was broken.
I thought I had found my soulmate. I remember when you used to come to my house to check up on me. I would hear a phone ring and rush to the phone to see who was calling me. When I saw your name my heart would skip a bit. I would look outside the window and see you and be over the moon. To hold you and lay my head on your chest and smell your scent made me fall in love with you more.
You would look in my eyes and tell me: “Uyangibusisa Mapholoba wami,” and tell me that you never felt like this before. I would become speechless.
I still remember on March 14, 2014, it was my birthday and you bought me a new phone, sweets and cake.
Days would turn into weeks, weeks into months, months into years. We began to fight and argue and say things we didn’t mean to each other, but we always found a way back to each other.
On D-Day, when you decided to hurt and betray me, you threw away all the memories we had together. How can such beautiful memories be destroyed in such a short space of time? I really thought I was dreaming – that someone would wake me up and tell me that it was a nightmare. The sad thing was that it was real. I never knew that love would feel like a heart attack.
I didn’t know that these memories would become a fantasy. Those seven years of our life together were just a fleeting waste of my time.
I guess in life I have learnt that you must never trust a person, a stone is more trustworthy. I should have listened when they told me, “Indlela ibuzwa kwabaphambili.”
“Stay away from boys they are nothing but trash, a rash that won’t go away.”
What happens when you have been hurt and betrayed by someone you truly love. Is it unfair for me to punish other people for someone-else’s sins?
I tried to let go so many times, but it seems like it’s always coming back to haunt me. I don’t want to become a prisoner of my past. Too many times I have been wrong. I guess being right takes too long. What I learnt is to never force things: relationships, friendships, love. Don’t stress about people who don’t wanna be in your life.
What crushes, crushes. What flows, flows. If something or someone is meant to be in your life, it will find a way to be in your life no matter how long it takes. You have to learn to let go of things. Just let them be.
I guess all that is left to do is reminisce.