I am sitting in a meeting with two gentlemen, both over the age of 55, when it dawns on me: I am the one I’ve been waiting for! As Oprah would have it, I had an ‘aha’ moment.
Okay, this is a lot of excitement for the beginning of an essay, so let me slow down and properly bring you up to speed about the day I had my life-changing ‘aha’ moment.
I had been working at my then job for less than a year, yet I was so unhappy. So much so that each day I longed for someone to come and save me. I thought perhaps salvation would come in the form of a funder for my projects or a different job altogether. I just thought that I needed a break, and that someone would come to my aid and, well, save me. But what I failed to realise was that I was the one who had to come to my aid.
I remember sitting at a dinner meeting, the guest of honour was an ex-MK soldier who looked white but was declared coloured in the apartheid era due to the fact that his grandmother had married outside her race. He identified as black. He spoke about the history of how he could never be black or white enough to fit in anywhere. So, at 60, he made something great out of his discomfort. When others were retiring, he was returning to his place of truth. Hearing him speak made me realise that I had abandoned mine in the quest of looking for a saviour.
I had given away my power to make something out of myself in hopes that someone else would notice me and do it for me. When I was always the one I needed to be noticed by.
So that night, when I eventually got home after the long dinner meeting, I chose to stop sleeping on myself. I decided to put my talents to work and create a different narrative for myself. A new website and social media pages were running by morning. Two months later, I left the job where I was unhappy and began building the kind of culture I desired to work under. All this, because on the 29th of April 2019, I had an ‘aha’ moment and it changed my life forever.
My new business now sees me travelling the world and being part of projects and events I could never have imagined. Also, with the flexible working hours, I am able to pursue my artistry and do what I’ve always wanted to do. I am, in colloquial terms, living my best life! While it may not have seemed so at the beginning, choosing to listen to the little voice that echoed from the table to my room that evening transformed my life for the better. Which is why I’ll end with this:
“It is not the moment itself that holds power; it is rather what we choose to do with it.”