Roy was caught in a whirlwind of confusion. His girlfriend slept next to him while he was on his phone texting with a secret lover. His secret lover was Rhys and Roy was unsure if he was homosexual, heterosexual or bi-sexual. After continuous heart-breaks and unfaithful relationships with women, he then tried a homosexual relationship. Life though being a mystery now saw Roy with both a good woman and a good man.
Having dated both Jessica and Rhys at the same time, he knew he was to let one go. Who would it be was his dilemma, Roy just wished his thoughts were not so clouded.
“Hey Rhys,” said Roy as he stood next to Rhys who had been looking over a pier. “Remember all those months ago we had met here?” said Rhys with a gentle smile as the setting of the sun caressed on his face.
Knowing Roy, Rhys knew that mentioning this meant he had something very important to say. Wearing a suit and smoking a cigarette, the masculine Roy now stood behind the feminine Rhys who was holding a teddy bear in hand, the first Roy had given him – the sentimental value of it was priceless.
“Rhys I’m… So sorry,”
“Shhh…. Roy I know you made it clear from day one that this relationship was just an experiment for you.”
“Believe me I hate myself for using you like this.” Was all Roy could say as he dumped his cigarette while walking away from Rhys. Tears trickled from Rhys’s eyes as he stared at the sunset. Holding the teddy bear with two hands Rhys held no hatred but love in his heart for Roy. Though it was difficult to get a homosexual relationship, he held tight to hope as he held on his teddy bear.
Trying to keep a straight face as he entered his car, Roy broke down in tears. Rushing out his car he ran to Rhys hugged and begged for his forgiveness. They hugged the day away as the night approached which now saw them separating for good.
“Hey baby, guess what? I baked your favourite, milk-tart,” said Jessica as Roy entered the house trying to force a smile.
“Well you never gave me a chance to reply, I’m sure I would have got it right.” He replied while mentioning that he was going to shower.
The memory of Rhys still ran circles around his head, while showering all Roy could think about was Rhys. Even though the shower provided philosophical and thinking moments, for the first time Roy saw the opportunity to cry as well.
Rhys had been curled up on his bed while holding his teddy bear in hand. He had shed so many tears that none were left to shed. A photo frame of him and Roy stood proudly visible on his dressing table. Having suffered for his sexuality both physically and discriminated upon, Rhys was finally able to accept himself. He tried letting go but the unconditional love he had for Roy seemed to be a double edged sword. Looking at the photos they took together, Rhys wished even to be a girl so long as he was with the person he loved.
Exiting the shower Roy changed in his night attire but still the memories he had of Rhys would not disappear. He felt numb in his entire body as he made his way downstairs to the kitchen.
Jessica stood baffled, starring at Roy as he seemed shocked in a confused manner.
“Jessica I think I’m in love with someone else.”