Uhm, a smile originally signals that one feels joy or happiness. Sometimes it is just temporary, because of a sudden joke that was made and caused you to laugh. And, sometimes it is a smile is more permanent, due to an achievement that could result in a party – and then everyone shares in the happiness.

But as time went by, a smile wasn’t (or isn’t) what it should portray – sometimes it’s actually more likely a sign of sadness…

My day starts off simply, just like anyone else’s. I wake up and get out of bed, brush my teeth, take a bath, eat breakfast and ready myself for the day’s duties. But in between all these little duties and tasks, I’m thinking about how I’ve been hurt, betrayed, mishandled. I’m reflecting on my previous incidents, failed relationships, my lack of confidence, fake friends or my failures.

So, I turn my entire day from ‘a brand new day’ to ‘same old same old,’ just through my thinking.

As I step out the house, I masquerade because that’s how I get through the day.

My ‘smile’ is activated the instant I greet my neighbour, because most of the time I don’t feel like it… and I always have a mental reply of “there’s nothing good about this morning”. And whenever I meet my exes I smile, and have a small chat and pretend to enjoy talking to them because that’s how they’ve always known me, but to be honest I always have conversations with myself like, “What did I ever do to you guys for you to backstab, cheat, betray and humiliate me like that? But I guess, karma is on her way.”

And being at school, makes everything worse for me because my entire day revolves around that environment. My past is there, like boyfriend/girlfriend and enemies, so I constantly have to up my game (and smile). Everything at school spreads like a virus, so it takes long for someone’s mistakes to be forgotten.

And ironically all my exes (even my current friends) once said “I know you” whereas I’m giving them a fake smile to hide the hurt I feel inside but they can’t even see it.

It’s hard, sometimes, to maintain this smile because I often feel so broken that I wish there was someone I would talk to. Someone I can truly open up to and tell them how I feel.

But I quickly counter that feeling with these words: “People out here don’t really care how you feel, so why should I.”

Then I’d try to comfort myself by pretending that I were happy. It’s the only way I know how to feel secure.

No one really knows how I feel. I don’t really blame them cause I’m the one hiding everything. But we live in a world where being sad, broken, unhappy or facing problems has become something to laugh about, and to ‘spread the word’ about.

I’ve once tried opening up to someone and telling them how I couldn’t take it anymore. And, just I had anticipated they thought that I was saying that I was ‘tired’. As they responded with the sentence, “You’ll be all right tomorrow!”

I wanted to say “Fuck you, you ignorant person!”… but then again no one cares, right?

So people, try to listen when someone speaks and try to not be so quick to answer. The saddest people have many potholes in their sentences, but if you can really listen, you’ll be able to hear.

Nothing beats a friend who listens, even if you don’t have words of encouragement or wisdom.

A friend who is able to truly listen can help one to feel better, because they’ve had a chance to say those things that have been bottled up inside. Then they may have a better chance of smiling a genuine smile.

Everything’s that’s trending now makes one ignorant to the real situations out there, because that’s why betrayal, cheating, rape, women abuse, corruption, poverty, bipolar disorder, trauma are things people just laugh about.


Tell us: Do you have a friend who listens?