2 October 2013

Even though I ended things, I can’t move on. I have tried but it’s still impossible. My heart is completely empty without you. I loved you, only you, Tiki my baby, my heart, my life and my soul.

I wanted to delete every memory of you but I can’t. It’s because my love for you is still in my heart. There are special moments I never want to forget.

When I was with you I felt your love embracing me every moment when we talked and it made me relaxed and comforted. My life will never be the same without you. I miss every moment we laughed and the precious time we had. My love has grown bigger even in your absence and we now live in two different worlds.

I try to forget you, I keep hearing your voice and your laugh. You are special to me and will always be. I loved you and only you alone. I thought we would grow together. My heart is shattered, my life is completely lost. My heart is completely empty without you. My life will never be the same again.

I found real love when I was with you even though you don’t feel the same. No one can replace you in my life. You are irreplaceable. I lost a precious jewel. I can’t carry on but I have to. You made your choice, I have to live by it. I really love you from the depths of my heart and soul. Maybe one day you will understand how much I loved you.

I can’t live without you. I tried to rectify my mistakes about lying to you. I didn’t want to lose you. You are still my other half and I know I can’t push you to love me. You disappeared and that breaks my heart. My love for you will never die, even though you said it’s over.

When I remember you are gone, my heart aches to its breaking point. Tears flow on my cheek, I crying quietly, hoping you will hear me but you are far. I thought you were my soulmate and was going to be a dad to my kids. Loving you made me the happiest woman alive. Remembering what we had keeps rewinding in my mind. My soul will never be the same again after losing you. I know I hurt you but I wanted us to try again but you didn’t give me a chance.

I lost you after thinking you will give me more. You just disappeared. What we promised each other is laid down to waste. You promised me the world, children, marriage, happiness, joy and peace. It all comes to waste.

I never forget how you talk, laugh and smile. I will always love you even if you don’t feel the same. Loving you is in my veins that circulate my blood stream. Love has grown even in your absence; it still lives in me. Sometimes we get what we love and lose it. I wanted you till death separated us. I wanted to grow old with you.

I don’t know how I will survive without you. You are the only man I loved and I guess we weren’t meant to be. Every moment can’t pass without me thinking about you. I really loved you. My heart is empty without you. If I could turn back the clock I would so that I could do right.

Remember when you proposed to me? You said, “Ndinokuda.” I had goose bumps and behaved like no one had ever said it. You are special in my heart. At first I thought it was a joke. Something I felt made me think there was a connection between us that is called love. I thought you were joking. I was speechless but in the end I believed you meant it.

My heart was broken when you said we couldn’t be together anymore. To maintain my age, I still love you. My love for you never dies; it continues to grow. You’ll always have a special place in my heart, Tiki. I love you more than the stars in the sky. You are still precious to me even if we are worlds apart. You are always the best.

It’s said that good things come once in a lifetime. Love came once and within months it was gone. The one you love most hurts you deep. I keep losing my mind. I love you, only you Tiki. Your presence makes my body move and goes further. You gave me hope to live. You made my life whole. You were the best thing in my whole life.

I dream of you every day, I don’t want to wake up from that dream. My love for you is forever enchanted. I remember when I wrote the letter talking about I was here with you. Love flew higher like birds. I wish things didn’t change.

Remember the times we had together; we were two naughty kids who loved each other. When I felt your body, I wanted it to be a lifetime. I didn’t tell you the truth because I didn’t want to lose you. I did everything for you. I wanted to stay closer with you, attached to you. Only God can explain the truth.

Requesting you on Facebook, I didn’t think it would lead us to being in love. You made the first movement and I followed. Something about you led me to feel your love. My mind and feelings grew bolder after you told me you loved me.

Thando lwami.

As Celine Dion sings:

You were my strength when I was weak.

You were my voice when I couldn’t speak.

You were my eyes when I couldn’t see.

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach.

You gave me faith coz you believed.

I am everything I am, because you loved me.

I miss all we had. I can’t wake up from the dream of us together. Just know if your love for me has died I will always love you. It’s fine if you moved on but remember I will always love you. My love for you is well assembled from the depths of my heart. I love you deeply. You are irreplaceable; no one can take your place in my heart.

You will never realise how much something is worth until you lose it. I just realised how much you were worth in my heart. Half of my body tries to live because half of it is dead, theother is alive.

I just hope you will forgive me one day. I don’t know if I will ever date again. This pain never goes away.


Tell us: Do you have some regrets in love? Share them with us, what happened?